If my torpor is left unchecked, I lose the ability to savor not only reading, but life itself. I develop a loathing for fresh food, letting salad greens and strawberries languish in the refrigerator while I fill up on popcorn.
–Kathleen Norris, Acedia and Me, p.16
Well, today I stood at the open refrigerator door, bathed in smelliness and gazing upon a mess of odds and ends food stuffs. I wanted to make something for lunch…something quick and easy so I could get on to the next activity lickety-split. All I found was a bunch of stuff I’d have to cook…aww, bah humbug, I thought, opening the freezer for something I could pop in the oven and be done with it.
And yet, as I put my hands on a frozen pizza, a little voice screamed, “RESIST, RESIST!”
I hearkened back to Norris’s book and thought about all the stuff I could put together if I really tried. Those carrots, that romaine, yesterday’s corn and canned tomatoes, that slightly souring onion…that black bean soup sitting in the cupboard. I really COULD put something together, but did I want to? Did I have the energy?
I finally decided yes, yes I DID have the energy…so one thing led to another and by the time I had to go to work I had whipped up a simple soup, salad, and some spaghetti sauce with my disparate ingredients. Yes, the Kitchen Cavewoman who can barely get a Hot Pocket out of the package made sauce out of kitchen parts. I can hardly believe it myself.
The season of Nativity is upon us, and for Orthodox Christians, this means Nativity Fast. I’ve been pondering and learning about the fast this year…and one thing I’ve discovered is that the fast should not be an act of pride, much to the chagrin of my Newly-Orthodox Self several years back, who jumped into such things with overzealous gusto by refusing to eat much of anything save a lima bean or two coated with ketchup. Okay, maybe that’s an exaggeration, but, my point is, I was diving into things waaay too deep. (Spiritual couch potatoes like me should not try to run marathons…)
Anyway, I believe the spirit of the fast (in my experience, at least) is not to chastise myself for eating a piece of meat or to neurotically monitor the amount of calories eaten (or not eaten), but to cut down on the eating so I can SAVOR what I do eat… and the God who gives me those things to eat. I empty myself of the bad, the superfluous, in order to fill myself with the good…with prayer, with God…and as a mind-body-spirit being, what I put into my physical body has a direct connection to this.
Like Norris says, even if certain foods (like popcorn) are “fast friendly”, not all of them necessarily stir up an appetite for what is good…I can keep the letter of the fast and still let my veggies go to waste.
For me, part of keeping the fast means skipping out on the Chipotle bean burrito when I can be content with what’s in my fridge…it means opting for fresh over frozen so the good foods don’t languish away.
I can’t single-handedly combat world hunger, rampant consumerism, or tackle all the vices in my heart this season, but I can make a small effort to rise above my tendencies toward laziness, wastefulness, and mindlessness one pot of homemade sauce at a time. And, the creative thought this requires is a nice perk.
Such a beautiful take on fasting! Thanks for this!
Thank you for reading!
Before I could move past the epigraph quote, I had to look that book up and mark it as to-read. What a great sentence on so many levels. Maybe I’m meant to stick with prose rather than poetry since I get so excited about a stinking good sentence.
But on to your post–it is amazing what beauty will come out of only having a few things to work with. I learned this when my family was struggling financially. We found all kinds of crazy ways to cook with what we though was nothing. And yet, it tasted better because we were grateful for it.
Being grateful is one of my favorite feelings. It is so simply how things should be–God is the Giver and we are the grateful. Fasting helps us do this. There really is so much more to fasting than “following the rules.” I think about this as I too gravitate to the veggie burrito in following the letter, but not to spirit of the fast.
Great post
Thanks, Sarah. Hope to see you tomorrow, God willing.